I Wish I Was Queer So I Could Get Chicks

Artist: Bloodhound Gang

Song: I Wish I Was Queer So I Could Get Chicks( Album one fierce beer coaster)

Tabbed by: John Leadman

Pretty funny song! All just basic power chords. Play the verses

palm-muted and use only downstrokes. Strum the chorus normally.

That's all you need to know. Enjoy!

CHORDS:

Bb5 (x13xxx) E5 (x79xxx)

A5 (x02xxx) Eb5 (x68xxx)

B5 (x24xxx) C#5 (x46xxx)

INTRO:

[spoken:]

If your ass is a Chinese restaurant I'll have the poo-poo platter

VERSE 1:

Bb5 A5 B5 C#5 E5 B5

My friend Jerry Vandergrift kissed me in Home Ec. class

A5 B5 C#5

Later in the afternoon some jarheads in the locker room kicked my ass

B5 A5 B5 E5

I said guys I'm like you I like Monster Trucks too

Eb5 C#5 A5

Wanna see how many push-ups I can do?

[stop]

B5

I just wish I was queer so I could get

CHORUS:

E5

Chicks dig guys that are

B5

Queer guys that don't dig

E5 B5

Chicks that don't dig guys like me

A5

See I'm not queer I'm too ugly

VERSE 2:

A5 B5 C#5 E5 B5

But if I were handsome just imagine how great it would be

A5 B5 C#5

Incognito as a gay though but not actually that way though pseudo homo phony

B5 A5 B5 E5

Maybe it's a stupid theory or maybe just stupidity

Eb5 C#5 A5

But if I was a queerbee in the fashion industry

B5 C#5

Scoring with a super model would be easy

VERSE 3:

A5 B5

Cause 'super model' means voluptuous but also is synonomous with

C#5 E5 B5

'super dumb'

A5 B5

Ya see I'd be a good listener so she'd treat me like a sister and

C#5 B5

soon I'd become

A5 B5 E5

That trusted friend that cares that rubs her back and braids her hair

Eb5 C#5 A5

No it wouldn't be a week before I'm in her underwear

[stop]

B5

I wish I was queer so I could get

CHORUS:

E5

Chicks dig guys that are

B5

Queer guys that don't dig

E5 B5

Chicks that don't dig guys like me

A5

See I'm not queer I'm too ugly

VERSE 4: [play like Verse 3]

Doesn't matter what I'm packin' in my denim it's what's in my genes

The only smoked meat the only sausage I would eat is made by Jimmy Dean

See I'm not to keen on the smell of Vaseline

No I'm not Princess Di and I don't wanna be a queen

I wish I was queer so I could get

BRIDGE:

E5 C#5 C#5 B5 A5 Bb5 B5 B5 A5 C#5 Eb5

Chicks

E5 C#5 C#5 B5 A5 Bb5 B5 B5 A5 C#5 Eb5

VERSE 5: [play like Verse 3]

Anyway if I were gay I'd have to change my name to Dirk or Lewis

Hang out with my mom's hair stylist his name is Kip he's got a lisp

he talks like this

And wear my mother's lingerie learn the songs of Broadway

And appreciate Depeche Mode and avant garde ballet

I wish I was queer so I could get

OUTRO:

C#5

Chicks dig guys that are

B5

Queer guys that don't dig

C#5

Chicks dig guys that are

E5 B5

Queer guys that don't dig

C#5

Chicks dig guys that are

B5

Queer guys that don't dig

C#5 E5

Chicks that don't dig guys like me

B5 C#5

See I'm not queer I'm too ugly

B5

And I don't shave my heiny

C#5

Don't shave my heiny

E5 B5 C#5

See I'm not queer I'm too ugly

B5

And I don't shave my heiny

C#5

Don't shave my heiny

E5 B5 C#5

See I'm not queer I'm too ugly

B5

And I don't shave my heiny

C#5

Don't shave my heiny

E5 B5 C#5

See I'm not queer I'm too ugly

frame chord frame arrow bottom frame arrow top
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